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<title>I WAS CRUSHED BY MY BOOKSHELF™ (NOT CLICKBAIT!!!1!!)(GONE SEXUAL!!1!!) by That_random_biotch</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28656264">I WAS CRUSHED BY MY BOOKSHELF™ (NOT CLICKBAIT!!!1!!)(GONE SEXUAL!!1!!)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/That_random_biotch/pseuds/That_random_biotch'>That_random_biotch</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The "CRUSHED BY MY BOOKSHELF" collections [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Vine - Fandom</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Adam., F/F, F/M, FUCK, Gen, I hate myself, M/M, Multi, Other, back to the actual tags, im stupid, miss keisha?, vine, vine girl</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-05-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 03:28:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,271</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28656264</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/That_random_biotch/pseuds/That_random_biotch</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>uhh v i n e s         : -)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>None</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The "CRUSHED BY MY BOOKSHELF" collections [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2100114</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Fuck                 : )</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Fuck.</p><p>I woke up, my hair covering my face. “My room is a fucking mess” I thought, looking around at all the Parry Hotter™ (don’t copyright us) shit on the floor. I literally rolled out of bed, first onto the floor </p><p>“Owowowowowow” i said as i pushed my limp body off the ground that was still littered with Parry Hotter™ merch. Then suddenly, I stepped on one of my many Parry Hotter LGEO™ sets. </p><p>“Sawarasenai kimi wa shoujo na no? böKù Wâ ÿARiçHiñ BįCChī ńO oSû Dà YO” I screamed in agony.</p><p>I laughed because I'm just built different. I continued laughing, all the way to my sock dresser. Yes. I had a dresser just for socks fuck you. Cause you can never start your morning without putting on a pair of Froot of the Loop socks. Please remind yourself that I'm only wearing these socks. Only these. </p><p>I walked over to my bookshelf only to realize that my Parry Hotter™ books were on the top shelf and this bookshelf is 6’4. (as a 5’5 girl i only date men who are taller than 10’10 so i wasn't attracted to this smh) i tried climbing up the bookshelf but my stuPID PARENTS FORGOT TO SCREW THIS MOTHER FUCKER INTO THE FUCKING WALL so i fell. I fell all the way down. And the bookshelf came with me. Somehow only crushing my left sosig arm. Now due to this book being for all ages clothes fell on me too. (ALSO IF U AR BABEY DONT TELL PARENTS) </p><p>I managed to crawl out from the- wait whose clothes are these. I'm too poor to afford these, Guochee veetouion shirts and Vultentino ugly track pants plus these very very ugly chanool slides, plus the super ugly vultentino white bag which had a red lipstick stain. God Damnit Marthkeeshaleeann (My sister) she about to be fucking dead.</p><p>“Marthkeeshaleeann? Marthkeeshaleeann?? Oh my fucking god she fucking dead”</p><p>    “FUCK YA CHICKEN STRIPS ADAM!!” Marthkeeshaleeann, shouted at me from her room.</p><p>“ADAM? Marthkeeshaleeann? We're going to see Trey's basketball game tonight so dress nice. Also I only have 69 cents so we can't have chicken nuggets for dinner.” Mother screeched like a pterodactyl at us. Then suddenly dad walked into my room and said,</p><p>“Ask me if I’m a truck.” So, I replied, “Are you a truck?” And that bitch. THAT BITCH. Said, “No!” and that pussy ran. Yall I was so mad my face was &gt;:(((( I honestly thought my dad was a truck. Like bitch pls. Btw we’re from Alabama. But we be livin in Canadinia right now. Anyways back to the story :O. Suddenly Marthkeeshaleeann walked down the stair and into the kitchen (I teleported there, and yes we only have 1 stair.) “Mom? Im a lesbian.” and this dumbass responded with “I thought you were american” suddenly they started beating eachother up. I sat down at the island </p><p>“CAN I GET A WAFFLE? CAN I PLEASE GET A WAFFLE”  “NO &gt;:C” Then I crawled over to the window with my broken ass arm and yeeted out of it. For some reason the kitchen was on the third floor so I broke my other arm. “Ow.” my neigh neigh burr walked outside and slapped my arm “i don't care that you broke your elbow”</p><p>“Now.. how are we gonna get to the hospital.. Oh I know! I'll go in my mum's car! Broom broom”</p><p>I heard a window open above me and a scream, “GET OUT ME CAR” aw. I started walking to the hospital and noticed my friends house</p><p>I quickly ran over there and knocked on the door. Unfortunately, I'm stronger with broken bones so the door exploded. And then I realized..<br/>
“I HAVE THE POWER OF GOD AND ANIME ON MY SIDE”</p><p> Nobody was home</p><p>I bolted like a wacky inflatable tube guy all the way to the hospital and ran right into the door. I think I broke my nose.</p><p>“Mother trucker dude... that hurt like a buttcheek on a stick.”</p><p> Welp. It sucks to be Adam. I mean, who names their daughter Adam? Walking into the hospital I see a nurse. “NuRsE gOy fRoM pOkEtManS???” I screech in excitement. Then the very clearly now male nurse looked at me and just said, “Adam?” Oh shit. This was my UnClE gReGoReE!!! “Art thou okay chile?” I shake my broken face ‘no’ “Um chile anyways so- Let’s get you f i x e d” So that’s what we did YaLl. But my bones still felt broken. But I lied when Uncle Gregoree asked me if I felt better. “GoLlY gEe BaTmAn! I hAvEnt feLt likE thiS in the elevenTeeN years of My Life!”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. hhhhhhh <  : )</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>hhhhhhh                                           &lt;  : )</p><p>Dorcten greegorii dragged me through the hospital, making sure to hit all the cronerererererers. </p><p>“You’re a blizzurd harry”<br/>“My name isn't harry”<br/>“Fuck off.”<br/>“K”<br/>“You aren’t a blizzurd &gt;:( You’re a bitch-zurd-”<br/>“Comedy Gorgoree.”<br/>“I know”<br/>“So, Gorg. Hows the kids?”<br/>“They got taken by CPS.”<br/>“Oh fun. Child Party sssssss…. Sss?.”<br/>“Yes”<br/>“Hows your wife?”<br/>“She also got taken by CPS”<br/>“O-O”<br/>“Criminal Police Service”<br/>“Oh”<br/>“She murdered mrs jorkinz”<br/>“OH NO NOT MORSES JORKENS”<br/>“Wait what day is ittt???”<br/>“Its wednesday my dudes”<br/>“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”</p><p>Gorengary continues dragging me through the hospital, finally we stopped and he threw me on the dreocten bed, prob how do i spell prob. Idk. brack ack acking more bons. I have brian damage. Not brain, brian. He gave me an avocado</p><p>“This should help.”<br/>“Its an avocado.. Thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanks…….”<br/>“Wait… Chris is that a weed?”<br/>“Whos chris-”<br/>“IM CALLING THE POLICE”<br/>“Wait what-”</p><p>BEEDOO BEEDOO THE POCILCE APPEARED OUT OF THIN AIR</p><p> </p><p>LIKE</p><p>MAGIC MAGIC AAAAAAAAAA MAGIC MAGIC AAAAAAAAAA</p><p>“:0 GRONG GET IN THE CUBICLE FOR PREFORMING IILEGAL MAJIK”<br/>“:0”<br/>“:0”</p><p>The police officers were too shoolice kth to say anything, suddenly the spell wore off and it turns out that the police were not actually police:0:0 They were MAI BEST FRENS</p><p>“Oh my gomsh you guysssss yu saved me from gre!!!”<br/>“Why do you look like that.”<br/>“Rude munch.. Anyvays i brok my fashe”<br/>“Why are you slurring your words”<br/>“BECAUMSHE MY FAHSEHSE IS BROKCKEN 🖤😢😭🖤😥🖤”<br/>“How the fuck did you speak emojis”<br/>“I jus can uwu”<br/>“And why is your hair so naughty”<br/>“Bc shes a bit kinky ;)”</p><p>Dorm gronkintree grabbed my arm broken and shook me onto the bed<br/>“Were putting adam under anesthesia now.”<br/>“What about my majikk potatoe??”<br/>“It was an avocado. And it wasn't magical at all.”<br/>“Ohhh deer i juts tweitted on tweenter that i got a manjick potat..”<br/>“You dont have a phone”<br/>“Yus i do. Llo0ok.”\</p><p>I tried showing the donkteyr gern that i had a phone b ut he took it form me :(((((( He amsked me “Where did u get this brik” bu t its not a brikc!!1!!!1 it sayss IPHONE453, GEG!!!1!!! I asmekd for my phon bak and hhe said “nnO ADam, Im not givinG this bamckm”!!!!111`!! I canmt believe him :(((*((((((( He3s suchm a bitsch!	!!!1!!!!! I realoloy hope he dpoesnt get5 his kids 0R his wife back :(((( i told him to go die and he put theis machgine on my favce!!!!! </p><p>SuDeeddnndlally ever4ytfhimg turned blackd so i jsut kindfa died i guess.</p><p>I gasped. Everything was back to normal now. Doctor Gengery smiled at me</p><p>“¿Hola mi amor Cómo está tu día?” I blinked. Is this mother fucker speaking spanish.<br/>“Hola querido estoy bien..”<br/> He looked shocked, “I didn't think you would actually answer in spanish</p><p>(LMAO, YOU THOUGHT THIS STORY WOULD BE PROPER????????? HAH NO BITCH.)</p><p>“Why wpouldnent i???? Nhuh???? Ye dats write. Fuk off”</p>
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